Hope

I have mentioned that when I saw Gabe's photo on Reece's Rainbow, and saw that he was soon to be transferred, I didn't suddenly feel all warm and fuzzy toward him (of course I thought he was adorable, but there was no instant connection like some describe), but i felt an URGENT need to commit to him. I felt panicky and very clearly told in my heart to do this NOW. I always thought it was because I didn't want to see this boy live the rest of his life institutionalized, but because of these recent events, I now believe God was telling me to get on the ball so that we could complete the process before the end of the year.

I believe God can soften hearts and prompt people to do things, but I also believe that he values our free agency above all else, and he will not force us to choose one way or another. I don't believe he would have taken the pen from Putin's hand to prevent his signature this morning banning all American adoptions. I do believe, however, that he will use the Holy Ghost to soften the hearts of those who can be an influence for good on others. I believe this is what he did in the case of the Deputy who has now proposed an amendment to allow special needs adoptions to continue. One of my favorite quotes says something to the effect of "God DOES answer prayers, but it is usually through another person that he meets our needs and answers those prayers." I am thankful for people who feel a prompting to do good and follow through with it! What a great example for me to remember and do in my own life!

The latest word from our agency is that our judge has agreed to issue our decree as long as the new bill doesn't specifically ask her to change her original ruling. Hallelujah! This is wonderful news. This means our facilitator in Moscow will attempt to pick up the Decree on January 10th. Once we have that in our hands, we can take it to get his new birth certificate, which will list is as his parents (tears!). We take that to the passport agency to get his passport, then flee to the American Embassy to get his travel visas so that he can enter the United States of America!!!! When his feet touch the ground in Denver International Airport, he will become a citizen of this great nation, with all the rights, privileges and protections she affords.

We know that nothing is set in stone, but this latest news gives us great reason to hope! We appreciate your prayers more than you'll ever know. No matter what happens, we will always be grateful. This is something I posted last night on Facebook, before we found out Putin had signed the bill, and before we got the good news about the amendment. I still feel this way, and always will:

We Need A Miracle

The news out of Moscow is looking grim, with rhetoric now including even those families who have passed court, like us, not being able to bring their children home. Will you pray that Putin vetoes this bill that has already passed Parliament? This little boy needs a family that will cherish him just the way he is....

O Holy Night

My darn computer has been giving me fits, not letting me log in to blog, and now it won't even let me get online, so I am typing this on my phone because I must write what is in my heart right now or it will burst!

We started this journey on a wing and a prayer. I personally did not have any assurances that this was absolutely the right thing to do. All I had was a large nudging by the Spirit, saying "do it now!" There have been so many doubts and hurdles along the way, mostly in my own mind. So much opposition politically, spiritually, and in general. BUT, there have been even more blessings along the way than there have ever been difficulties. Tears of joy and humility have far outnumbered tears of fear, doubt or struggle.

This morning, on Christmas Eve, we found this envelope on our porch, pictured below. "Good luck in Russia..." was scrawled on the outside. Inside, a most generous gift. The neatest thing is, I can immediately think of a dozen people who could have left this for us. That is why I am crying while I write this. I am not a super social person, I love people dearly and enjoy being with friends, but in many ways I am shy. To say that this adoption process has humbled me and made me step outside my comfort zone would be the biggest understatement of the year. It was never my intent to let anyone know of our financial need. But time and again, mostly through other people, God has told me, "Let me bless you. Just let me bless you." He loves Gabriel so much. He loves all of us so much. Of this I have no doubt. He has blessed us beyond measure to assure Gabriel will come home to us.

There is so much misery and turmoil in the world, even as I write. Innocent children murdered, countries quarreling or at war, and the list goes on. But He is aware of each of us. We are numbered to him. He loves us even more than we love our own children, which is impossible to comprehend. When I am feeling unworthy of His love, like I am failing at every turn, I need only think of how much I love my own children, how I would lay down my life for them without ever thinking twice about it, and I remember that is How he feels about me.

With this new proposed bill in Russia that may cut off all adoptions to Americans, there has been much fear, heartache and devastation in families across this country. There are families I know who have already traveled to meet "their" child, they have fallen in love and felt strongly that the child should be a part of their family. While their fear is palpable, so is their faith. I have read expressions of, "These children are numbered to God. He will be with them. They may have to endure the unthinkable, but He will make it right one day." These families are my heroes.

So in a nutshell, I just wanted to say, there is so much holiness in the world, even in the midst of misery. My eyes have been opened to this reality, and my prayer for you is that you see the good in the world, too.

Thank you, our Christmas Eve Elf, for your gift of hope, love, inspiration. We will not miss the opportunity to pay it forward.

Merry Christmas